Making Agreements With Your Child

“She’s having such a hard time following the rules,” my mom said about my daughter. 

It’s true, the last few weeks have been hard for my little four-year-old. She had the stomach flu, caught a cough from her brother, and now has an ear infection. 

We have been giving her extra love for sure  But the comment from my mom made me think. What do us parents do when our children aren’t “following the rules”?

Here’s a parenting tip you can use ...

Have a family meeting about the concern. Start the meeting with appreciations. Ask your child to help you find a solution to the problem. Once a solution is agreed upon, test it for a week and then check back in to make sure everyone is happy with the progress. 

Have a parenting question? Email me and I’ll post the answer without breaking your anonymity. 


5 Tips for a Calmer Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today is about family, friends, food, and fun! But, if you have children, it can also be overwhelming getting them prepared for the day, while trying to get yourself ready with meals and potentially traveling.

Here are 5 tips for a calmer Thanksgiving …

1. Before going to dinner or having people over to your home, have a mini meeting with your children to create agreements around behavior. Let your children remind you of your family rules and let them know what you will do if they aren’t following through on the agreements. For example, if siblings are fighting then let them each identify a space to have some cool down and calm down time. Letting them be part of the process gives them a sense of power and also ensures that your family is on the same page.

2. If a problem does occur, take a moment to connect with your children before you redirect their behavior. For example, if your son is mad that he can’t eat pie yet, let him know that you see how angry and disappointed he is. Then, give him a choice for something he can do.

3. Bring calming activities for the car ride - coloring books and picture books are a great idea. Thanksgiving can be overstimulating for children, so have something that can help reground them.

4. Find five minutes today to get down on the floor with your children and play. The more connected they feel to you, the easier it is to help them when they are having big feelings.

5. Have you taken a moment for yourself today to BREATHE? Find a quiet place to sit and tune into your body. Take some deep breaths and imagine sunlight radiating through your body. Ground into yourself and give yourself some LOVE.